


The darkest of places.

by Kaorukeehl



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Depression, Suicidal Thoughts, no dialogue challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-20
Updated: 2017-07-20
Packaged: 2018-12-04 11:14:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11554035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaorukeehl/pseuds/Kaorukeehl
Summary: The darkness of the world is something we can't always escape from but one thing we can never ever escape from is a place darker than the darkness that is around you. Your mind. It has times we might feel trapped within such a powerful darkness. Now it is Sans who must face the darkest of places but what will come of it? Will he make it out or will the darkest of place consume him until there is nothing left to even save?





	The darkest of places.

**Author's Note:**

> This is made in the spirit of a challenge I made myself known as The No Dialogue Challenge. Where characters are not allowed to actually say something throughout the entire story. ALSO made on my phone so I hope I caught all autocorrects.

There was excitement and a lot of commotion for the first while in which the headlines were all about it.

Monsters return to the surface and make peace with mankind! 

So many variations of that headline but after the first month or so things died down. 

The papers have moved on. Though there is still monsters or even things happening with monsters making it into the papers it's nothing like the ones before. 

I thought that being on the surface would bring up my mood and I'd feel more at peace away from the bad memories. I thought that maybe this would let me start anew.... I wasn't really correct. 

As soon as all that hype and attention from us monsters coming to the surface died off my mind could focus on anything else. 

... 

But I didn't like where it took me. 

It lead me here.

I am leaning against the railing of the bridge with my arms crossed on it allowing my chin to slightly rest on them. I am looking down at the road below as many vehicles pass along it though there has hardly been anyone walking around this area. 

Which isn't surprising considering that it's a bridge over a highway both leading to the outskirts. 

I can't help but wonder what it would be like to climb over this railing and plummet to the road below. I wonder about whether there would be an afterlife I have yet to see. I think about how I'm not useful and that I must be such a burden to everyone. I think about how everyone would be happier in the end without me. I can't do anything right and I couldn't save anyone. 

Not even once.

I'm just so useless and weak that it's pathetic. I didn't stop them earlier when I knew that they were killing. I didn't do something to prevent so many deaths and so much pain. I'm cowardly and I could have saved them but I didn't as I waited instead. My head moves until my forehead is laying against my arms. I don't deserve to be here alive when so many had to suffer because I didn't take action. I am not worthy of anything because of that. I couldn't pull through even when I was needed the most. I am just a failure. I raise my head so now up to my mouth is covered by my arms as my eyes scan the road below. 

They wouldn't see it coming and they'd have no time to stop. 

I'd be run over in seconds possibly more than once. I'd be dead before I knew it. 

If I do this then I'll be ridding the world of my uselessness and it'll be a better place when I'm gone. That's just how it is and how it will be. 

My eyes fall to half open as I just think about how all of this could go down the moment I leapt from this railing. 

Would I hit head first or would my body hit the road below first? How many cars would run me over before it stopped? Would I even survive long enough to be hit by a car? Or would my body hit a car before it'd hit the road? 

So many possibilities of how this could turn out in the end and they seem to be mostly appealing. 

I'd be dust left to float off in the wind and maybe I'll live on in the wind and be able to see that everyone is indeed better off without me. I can't tell them what I'm thinking or what I know happened during the time of resets because it's all my burden to bear, not theirs. I can't tell them anything about why or what was going through my head because I'd only make myself even more of a burden to the others.

Though right now with the wind blowing through the area like a slightly strong breeze it brings a cool felling. This cool wind is not very helpful in any kind of comfort. It is as if the wind itself is encouraging me too just climb this railing and jump before someone could stop me. As if it even wishes for me to stop existing within this life and to leave the world to let it be a better place. 

... However...

Despite the feeling of the entire world even the air we breath is pushing me over the railing I have a problem... 

I can hear the screaming deep down within me just telling me to do it except that my body isn't responding. I can't move forward to jump and I can't move back away from the edge. I'm just stuck right here in this moment in this spot just thinking... Wondering... Imagining... Contemplating... I'm just stuck on the edge between doing it and not doing it. I really should though... After all my life, my pathetic life, isn't worth living if I'm just going to be a failure and a burden to everyone around me.

But why am I just stuck on this edge where I can't go either way even though everything in my entire body already knows what must be done. 

Am I afraid? Do I fear that the release of death will not forever destroy this burden I carry as I hope it would? Am I afraid of facing another horrible and painful death? To relive the painful slightly slow experience of turning to dust possibly for the last time ever? Or do I fear that when Frisk and Chara learn that I am gone that they will reset and I'll just end up ruining everyone's happy ending by forcing them underground once more?

It is a very possible possibility but I mean what if it doesn't happen? What if they've already accepted that everyone will die eventually and won't reset just because I die? 

I mean I did kill them before even if they came right back so maybe they'll be happy that I'm gone. 

Along with the rest of the world. 

It's a lot to think about even if I want to just do it. 

The sound of a rock or two being disturbed somewhere to my right side. 

I wait for the sound of a car to pass behind me but that doesn't happen making me blink in slight confusion. I raise my head and I turn to the direction that the noise had come from. My eyes meet with another monsters own eyes. 

This monster has a slightly longer more narrow head and eyes that are watching me. The monster has on a white round with round white sleeves top with gold stripes on the edges of each end as well as red markings on the chest area, a red scarf, red gloves with similar gold edges, blue pants covering the pelvis and hip area also having a gold edge, a tight black body suit underneath it all and red boots with three black rectangle shapes on the front of each boot. 

There's no mistaking it... Papyrus... But how long has he been standing there for? How long have I myself been standing here? Further more was he really looking for me? 

... No...

This has to be some kind of coincidence as maybe he went for a walk as he does since he's used to the patrolling he did underground. Old habits die hard. Surely he just ran into me on accident right? 

Papyrus hasn't said anything as he just watches me as if he already knows. He stands there seemingly unable to tear his gaze from me but I can hardly think enough to really read his gaze... All I can think about is the fear of what he's going to do but maybe it'll be the final push I need to make myself stop burdening everyone. 

I close my eyes and I also turn my head away to face forward waiting for him to yell at me, to storm away or maybe some mixture of both. I wait not saying a word as I don't really see a point in saying anything right now plus I just want this moment to end so I can do what I must do. 

There's soft crunching of footsteps causing me to let out a quiet shaky breath. So he's going to just walk away without saying a word to me... I guess it's better this way because the likes of me don't really deserve a word before I leave. 

Suddenly a pair of arms wrap around me causing my eyes to snap open in shock. 

I slightly turn to look to Papyrus who is the one that is hugging me. I blink at this and my mind has gone blank as I just stare at his currently closed eyes. I'm not sure what to say or if I should even say anything at all. I decide to remain silent and I find myself leaning into the embrace feeling safe.

Safe from the thoughts that were once shouting in my head and the feeling of holding a heavy weight.

I feel warmer and comforted. My black with a white stripe on either side shorts no longer hill my legs in the wind. My blue sweater with a grey hood plus grey t-shirt feel lighter without the burden weighing me down. I close my eyes resting the side of my head against Papyrus's chest enjoying this moment. 

All of this is starting to make me remember. Remember that I am Sans the brother of the coolest monster who has and will ever exist. That I am cared for and that even in this dark time I have at least my cool brother to be there for me. Just like we've been doing since we met after Papyrus was born. 

After a little bit of a comfortable silence where Papyrus just holds me he suddenly shifts his arms; causing me to open my eyes wondering what he's doing. He moves his hands to underneath my armpits lifting me up and my pink slippers slip off of my feet. 

It happens a few times but not all the time as usually they are really good about staying on my feet. 

Papyrus pulls me close so on instinct I do my best to wrap my arms around him by his neck and my legs around his waist. He places an arm by my butt area to keep me from falling down. 

I also lean my body against his letting myself just relax in his familiar hold. I have been carried by him many many time before, so much so that no monster even so much as bats an eye at it while most humans seem to ignore it. I prefer it when Papyrus carries me and he's the only one that can just pick me up like this unless I'm unconscious or hurt. However those two should be obvious for why I probably will let someone pick me up if it is needed to be done. I have a habit of waking up when I'm picked up though with Papyrus I sometimes recognize his touch so I might remain asleep with him. I swear he has some magic touch where I can't help but be able to easily sleep even when he's carrying me around. 

Papyrus squats down picking up my slippers with his free hand only to hand them to me. 

I only move one arm to take them then tuck them between our bodies before putting my arm back into position. 

Papyrus rises then he turns back to the city and begins jogging in that direction having no trouble in carrying me. 

I close my eyes softly as I let myself enjoy this. I know that when I'm in the darkest of places then at least I'll have Papyrus who'll reach out to me. I know that he can be relied on to let me lean on him so he may support me so I can get back on my feet. I just wish that I hadn't forgotten about all of this... About how cool my brother is, how caring he is and how much we actually care for each other. I would change what happened except for when Papyrus reminded me that he does care about me. I would change it to make it a bit more happier. I lay my head against his shoulder and open my eyes only slightly to watch the scenery around us go by. I knew that it would happen but I really could go for a nap in my brothers arms. I just want to stay awake for as long as I can to remain in the moment. I don't want it to pass by too quickly after all. I'm just glad that I at least have Papyrus.

The end.


End file.
